Post by GhostLiger on Jun 1, 2011 16:41:26 GMT -5
Years ago I planned (And wrote some of) my very first attempt at Zoids Fanfiction. Sadly the idea got ditched and a slapstick rewrite was planned after I got obsessed with Excel Saga.
Sadly this also got scrapped, but not before some ideas were jotted down, co written by me and Electric. I keep these for shits, giggles and memories and thought I should share.
Note: Zeke refers to TC's cousin, not the organoid, Red is a Redler (surprise surprise), Alpha is a heavily armoured Command Wolf with a multipurpose gattling and CPC gun, and yes, Ash is Ketchum.
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TC: “Looks like the only way we’re gonna be able to beat the Death Saurer is to destroy its Zoid core. And, in order to get through its tough armour, we’re gonna need a Zoid with sharp blades!”
Van: *bounces up and down like a lunatic* “Oh, oh, pick me!”
Dom: “Wait, I know a Liger that would be perfect for the job!”
Van: “Pick me, PICK ME!”
TC: “What Liger’s that then?”
Van: “PICK ME!”
Dom: *Dramatic pause* “Liger Zero Schneider!”
Van: *Characteristic anime fall over action*
TC: “Dom… the Liger Zero hasn’t been invented yet!”
Dom: “Oh crap, you’re right” *pauses to think* “Oh well, let’s just launch the Geno Breaker out of the Gravity Cannon then!
TC: “Do you really think the Geno Breaker’s blade is going to be strong enough to pierce armour that tough?”
Dom: “Nope”
TC: “Then why are we launching it at the Death Saurer?”
Dom: “Who said anything about launching it at the Death Saurer? I made a bet with Moonbay over how far the Geno Breaker will fly!”
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THE END!
Dom: “The End? That’s it? All our hard work, lost Zoids and plot holes, not to mention your months and months of writing, rewriting then ditching the whole thing and coming up with a new idea, and THAT’S the best ending you could come up with? I wanna talk to my agent! I have a good mind to fire you!”
Shadow Liger: “You can’t fire me! I’m the Author!! Try taking part in your next adventure without me to narrate for you!”
Dom: “ULTIMA!”
(Slightly Scorched) Shadow Liger: “MEEP! Okay, okay, how’s this sound?
THE END…?
Dom: “Much better!”
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Dr. D: “Right, let’s get the Geno Breaker loaded up into the Gravity Cannon”
Moonbay: “Where did that Ultra Saurus come from? It wasn’t there a second ago!”
Dom: “Don’t worry about that, it’s just an incontinuity put in deliberately by the Author just so she doesn’t have to make up an explanation as to where the Ultra Saurus has been all this time!”
*Whilst the Geno Breaker is being loaded up, the Death Saurer continues its rampage of the city/pile of rubble. Just before the command to fire the Geno Breaker could be uttered, the Death Saurer suddenly stops dead, shudders, then falls apart*
Lance: “Oh well, guess that’ll teach me to install the command options using Microsoft Windows for Zoids!”
TC: “Um, looks like we won… I think!”
Raven: “What happened? Is it over? Does this mean I don’t have to go through with this after all?”
Fiona: “FIRE!”
Raven: “What? YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!”
Moonbay: “Hmmm, that’s pretty far… but not quite far enough. C’mon Domino, you lost, pay up!”
Dom: “RAVEN! YOU TRAITOR!!”
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Dom: “Thunderchild? What the hell are you doing?”
TC: “I must sacrifice my life and my Zoid in true stereotypic anime fashion to save the lives of everyone else, so I’m going to stop the Death Saurer’s Intake fan using Red’s wreckage!”
Dom: “No Thu, don’t be stupid!”
TC: “I’m not, Dom, I must do this to save you!”
Dom “No, what I mean is… This Death Saurer doesn’t have an Intake fan!”
TC: “WHAT??”
Dom: “It’s right there in the last four episodes of Guardian Force! I said you should’ve watched them before we had to face the Death Saurer!”
TC: “Oh, SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!”
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Odd Guy: “WOW! They’re producing Command Wolves with Charged Particle Cannons now?” *Takes loads of snapshots of Thunderchild’s Command Wolf Alpha then runs off*
Dom: “Who was that?”
TC: “I dunno, but he dropped his calling card” *Thunderchild picks up the little rectangle card and reads it* “It says here he works for someone named Tommy!”
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Dr. D: “Right, the first matter on the agenda is… Raven, you’re being far too cheerful! Stop it, you’re ruining your character reputation!”
Raven: “Aw!” *Takes a bottle marked Prozac out of his pocket and tosses it in the bin*
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*Shadow Fox and Hel Cat duke it out, Shadow Fox wins*
Ash: “What? This is impossible!”
Zeke: “Of course it isn’t, after all, you’re just a random character the Author dragged in from another Anime simply because you had some significance in a story pre-dating this one! You aren’t supposed to be a good Zoid pilot!”
Ash: “I’m not talking about that! The Shadow Fox isn’t supposed to appear until part way through New Century Zero!”
Shadow Liger: “Ah, about that… you see, this part was written before I found that out, and I can’t be bothered to change it! And, as the author, my word is law! So, enough Anime Stereotypic endless banter… GET ON WITH IT!”
Red Blade Liger: “Hello!”
Shadow Fox: “Oh shit!” *Red Blade Liger barrels into Shadow Fox, knocking it over. Shadow Fox’s cockpit flies open with the impact and Zeke falls out*
Domino: “Remember kids, always wear your seat belt when fighting in science fiction mechs!
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TC: “Ok, three, two, one, fire!” *hit’s the booster button on Red, the wings begin to fold back, shudder and drop off*
TC: “Hmm” *taps his fingers irritably on the control panel*
TC: *Rubs his hands and walks back into Reds cockpit* “Ok, three, two, one, fire!”
* Camera pans out to reveal Red attached to a catapult, the catapult fires but Red only travels about two metres and lands nose first into the ground*
TC: *Looks backward out of the cockpit and shuts the cockpit hatch* “Ok, three, two, one, fire!” *hit’s a button, camera pans out to reveal Red facing vertically with rocket boosters attached to it like a Space Shuttle, the boosters fire but leave Red behind which then promptly falls over*
*TC growls nervously, kicks the rocket boosters a couple of times and climbs back into the cockpit, the set-up is the same as the last attempt only this time there are a few more boosters and a lot of rope attaching them to the Zoid*
TC: “Ok…three, two, one, fire!”
*Nothing happens*
TC: “I said FIRE!”
*hit’s the button harder, again, nothing happens.*
TC: “FIIIIIRE!!”
*kicks the cockpit floor*
*The boosters fire but in reverse and Red lands up deep underground, cut to TC looking very unamused, a certain genomes face appears upside down at the cockpit window*
Domino: “You still not got this thing to fly?”
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TC: *patting Alpha* “Yeah! I’m the god of upgrades!!” *does a happy dance*
Dr D: Hehe! I don’t think so!! You’re still learnin’!!
TC: *folds arms* Oh yeah? Is that so…old man? I think I could upgrade anything!
Dr D: Yeah? Then upgrade this!! *points to Molga*
TC: Aaaah!! Err…I mean, yeah! *looks nervous*
*Some time later*
TC: Ohkay…let’s do this!
*presses a button to activate the giant cannon on the Molga’s back*
TC: Let’s go Molga!!
*cannon fires, Molga disappears into the horizon with the recoil*
TC: Fudgebuckets…
*some more time later*
TC: Ohkay…this can’t possibly go wrong.
*presses button to activate missile launchers on the back of the Molga, the missile launcher pivots up, opens fire…and buries the Molga into the ground with the recoil.*
TC: *hits head in Homer mode* D’OH!!
(*ue a series of scenes*
*Scene 1: Molga opens fire with twin chain guns and shakes so much that the guns fall off*
*Scene 2: Molga now has some blade liger boosters, goes so fast across the landscape that it catches fire*
*Scene 3: Molga now has twin blades, unfortunately the blades are too heavy for the Molga and all they achieve is twin furrows in the ground, one either side of the Molga*
*a long time later*
TC: Ok…I finally did it…I now know how to upgrade the Molga!!
Dr D: Huh?
*He stares at the Molga which has no changes to it what so ever.*
TC: Yup…this is the only way that this Molga can be improved….ALPHA!!
*Alpha strolls over…eyes up the Molga…and then opens fire with his CPC, turning the Molga into a smoking crater. Alpha roars with satisfaction.*
TC: There…see…a great improvement.
Sadly this also got scrapped, but not before some ideas were jotted down, co written by me and Electric. I keep these for shits, giggles and memories and thought I should share.
Note: Zeke refers to TC's cousin, not the organoid, Red is a Redler (surprise surprise), Alpha is a heavily armoured Command Wolf with a multipurpose gattling and CPC gun, and yes, Ash is Ketchum.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
TC: “Looks like the only way we’re gonna be able to beat the Death Saurer is to destroy its Zoid core. And, in order to get through its tough armour, we’re gonna need a Zoid with sharp blades!”
Van: *bounces up and down like a lunatic* “Oh, oh, pick me!”
Dom: “Wait, I know a Liger that would be perfect for the job!”
Van: “Pick me, PICK ME!”
TC: “What Liger’s that then?”
Van: “PICK ME!”
Dom: *Dramatic pause* “Liger Zero Schneider!”
Van: *Characteristic anime fall over action*
TC: “Dom… the Liger Zero hasn’t been invented yet!”
Dom: “Oh crap, you’re right” *pauses to think* “Oh well, let’s just launch the Geno Breaker out of the Gravity Cannon then!
TC: “Do you really think the Geno Breaker’s blade is going to be strong enough to pierce armour that tough?”
Dom: “Nope”
TC: “Then why are we launching it at the Death Saurer?”
Dom: “Who said anything about launching it at the Death Saurer? I made a bet with Moonbay over how far the Geno Breaker will fly!”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
THE END!
Dom: “The End? That’s it? All our hard work, lost Zoids and plot holes, not to mention your months and months of writing, rewriting then ditching the whole thing and coming up with a new idea, and THAT’S the best ending you could come up with? I wanna talk to my agent! I have a good mind to fire you!”
Shadow Liger: “You can’t fire me! I’m the Author!! Try taking part in your next adventure without me to narrate for you!”
Dom: “ULTIMA!”
(Slightly Scorched) Shadow Liger: “MEEP! Okay, okay, how’s this sound?
THE END…?
Dom: “Much better!”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dr. D: “Right, let’s get the Geno Breaker loaded up into the Gravity Cannon”
Moonbay: “Where did that Ultra Saurus come from? It wasn’t there a second ago!”
Dom: “Don’t worry about that, it’s just an incontinuity put in deliberately by the Author just so she doesn’t have to make up an explanation as to where the Ultra Saurus has been all this time!”
*Whilst the Geno Breaker is being loaded up, the Death Saurer continues its rampage of the city/pile of rubble. Just before the command to fire the Geno Breaker could be uttered, the Death Saurer suddenly stops dead, shudders, then falls apart*
Lance: “Oh well, guess that’ll teach me to install the command options using Microsoft Windows for Zoids!”
TC: “Um, looks like we won… I think!”
Raven: “What happened? Is it over? Does this mean I don’t have to go through with this after all?”
Fiona: “FIRE!”
Raven: “What? YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!”
Moonbay: “Hmmm, that’s pretty far… but not quite far enough. C’mon Domino, you lost, pay up!”
Dom: “RAVEN! YOU TRAITOR!!”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dom: “Thunderchild? What the hell are you doing?”
TC: “I must sacrifice my life and my Zoid in true stereotypic anime fashion to save the lives of everyone else, so I’m going to stop the Death Saurer’s Intake fan using Red’s wreckage!”
Dom: “No Thu, don’t be stupid!”
TC: “I’m not, Dom, I must do this to save you!”
Dom “No, what I mean is… This Death Saurer doesn’t have an Intake fan!”
TC: “WHAT??”
Dom: “It’s right there in the last four episodes of Guardian Force! I said you should’ve watched them before we had to face the Death Saurer!”
TC: “Oh, SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIT!”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Odd Guy: “WOW! They’re producing Command Wolves with Charged Particle Cannons now?” *Takes loads of snapshots of Thunderchild’s Command Wolf Alpha then runs off*
Dom: “Who was that?”
TC: “I dunno, but he dropped his calling card” *Thunderchild picks up the little rectangle card and reads it* “It says here he works for someone named Tommy!”
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dr. D: “Right, the first matter on the agenda is… Raven, you’re being far too cheerful! Stop it, you’re ruining your character reputation!”
Raven: “Aw!” *Takes a bottle marked Prozac out of his pocket and tosses it in the bin*
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
*Shadow Fox and Hel Cat duke it out, Shadow Fox wins*
Ash: “What? This is impossible!”
Zeke: “Of course it isn’t, after all, you’re just a random character the Author dragged in from another Anime simply because you had some significance in a story pre-dating this one! You aren’t supposed to be a good Zoid pilot!”
Ash: “I’m not talking about that! The Shadow Fox isn’t supposed to appear until part way through New Century Zero!”
Shadow Liger: “Ah, about that… you see, this part was written before I found that out, and I can’t be bothered to change it! And, as the author, my word is law! So, enough Anime Stereotypic endless banter… GET ON WITH IT!”
Red Blade Liger: “Hello!”
Shadow Fox: “Oh shit!” *Red Blade Liger barrels into Shadow Fox, knocking it over. Shadow Fox’s cockpit flies open with the impact and Zeke falls out*
Domino: “Remember kids, always wear your seat belt when fighting in science fiction mechs!
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TC: “Ok, three, two, one, fire!” *hit’s the booster button on Red, the wings begin to fold back, shudder and drop off*
TC: “Hmm” *taps his fingers irritably on the control panel*
TC: *Rubs his hands and walks back into Reds cockpit* “Ok, three, two, one, fire!”
* Camera pans out to reveal Red attached to a catapult, the catapult fires but Red only travels about two metres and lands nose first into the ground*
TC: *Looks backward out of the cockpit and shuts the cockpit hatch* “Ok, three, two, one, fire!” *hit’s a button, camera pans out to reveal Red facing vertically with rocket boosters attached to it like a Space Shuttle, the boosters fire but leave Red behind which then promptly falls over*
*TC growls nervously, kicks the rocket boosters a couple of times and climbs back into the cockpit, the set-up is the same as the last attempt only this time there are a few more boosters and a lot of rope attaching them to the Zoid*
TC: “Ok…three, two, one, fire!”
*Nothing happens*
TC: “I said FIRE!”
*hit’s the button harder, again, nothing happens.*
TC: “FIIIIIRE!!”
*kicks the cockpit floor*
*The boosters fire but in reverse and Red lands up deep underground, cut to TC looking very unamused, a certain genomes face appears upside down at the cockpit window*
Domino: “You still not got this thing to fly?”
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TC: *patting Alpha* “Yeah! I’m the god of upgrades!!” *does a happy dance*
Dr D: Hehe! I don’t think so!! You’re still learnin’!!
TC: *folds arms* Oh yeah? Is that so…old man? I think I could upgrade anything!
Dr D: Yeah? Then upgrade this!! *points to Molga*
TC: Aaaah!! Err…I mean, yeah! *looks nervous*
*Some time later*
TC: Ohkay…let’s do this!
*presses a button to activate the giant cannon on the Molga’s back*
TC: Let’s go Molga!!
*cannon fires, Molga disappears into the horizon with the recoil*
TC: Fudgebuckets…
*some more time later*
TC: Ohkay…this can’t possibly go wrong.
*presses button to activate missile launchers on the back of the Molga, the missile launcher pivots up, opens fire…and buries the Molga into the ground with the recoil.*
TC: *hits head in Homer mode* D’OH!!
(*ue a series of scenes*
*Scene 1: Molga opens fire with twin chain guns and shakes so much that the guns fall off*
*Scene 2: Molga now has some blade liger boosters, goes so fast across the landscape that it catches fire*
*Scene 3: Molga now has twin blades, unfortunately the blades are too heavy for the Molga and all they achieve is twin furrows in the ground, one either side of the Molga*
*a long time later*
TC: Ok…I finally did it…I now know how to upgrade the Molga!!
Dr D: Huh?
*He stares at the Molga which has no changes to it what so ever.*
TC: Yup…this is the only way that this Molga can be improved….ALPHA!!
*Alpha strolls over…eyes up the Molga…and then opens fire with his CPC, turning the Molga into a smoking crater. Alpha roars with satisfaction.*
TC: There…see…a great improvement.
